The truth is, I think about this dress ALOT. It keeps me up at night, I drift away to "seam" land at work, it's with me in the car at stoplights. Of all the art projects I had in school, none ever consumed me like this one.
Friday I made the drive to Quail Springs to...Forever 21 (my favorite!). With some French rock band playing overhead, I started my usual systematic combing of the overloaded clothes racks--beginning at the front left of the store, zigzagging to the back and up again. And this time, I set my eyes to the color white.
Near the back of the store, I found three shirts that were possibilities. While standing near the wall, I even uttered a small prayer that God would give me the perfect material--a far shot, I know, but I've come to enjoy making those sorts of requests. And, it just so happened, that I found it...
The shirt is a little big through the bust, but I knew I could take it in. And the interfacing fabric was almost the exact same type of knit as the fabric I had bought originally. The color didn't match perfectly, but it was close. In fact, the contrast of the ivory fabric and the off white of the shirt might be nice. The top is the strapless empire-waist I had envisioned, complete with a ruched midriff.
When I got home, I studied the make of the shirt intently. I had to have a plan, because I was about to dismantle the thing. Here is a pic of the inside.
I got to work taking out the seam that connected the midriff to the “skirt”.
And voila! I had the perfect "pre-made" bodice to my dress. No patterns, measuring, or seam allowances required. Success!
So, here is my analogy:
Once, I thought that love was something we would construct completely for ourselves from ideals. Sure, I'm very aware of the standards of perfection that literature and film present to us, and for a long time, I sought to make my story conform to a movie-worthy plot. My intent here is not to criticize human expression through these avenues; I believe very strongly in the human capacity to manifest meaning. Perhaps what we wish it could have been is just as important as what it turned out to be, and the linear progression of time and life are strongly manifested in these human narratives.
But for making sense of life: I've come to value embracing those details (large or seemingly small) that did not conform to the way we would have had it. And maybe that is the heart of faith and the sister of optimism, this full integration of knowing that God is continually working ALL things together for our good. And this time, I just happened find it hanging on a back rack at Forever 21.
